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Simple Ways to Focus on Your Mental Health in 2018

posted on : January 17, 2018 posted by : Stnkrbug 0 Comment

While I was sitting down staring at my 2018 goals in my bullet journal, I noticed so many of my hopes for the year are related to mental health. I thought I would do a blog post about why it’s important to focus on your mental health in the new year, and why I’m glad I started focussing on it in the last couple years. Make sure to read my last post, Simple Ways to Stay Grateful in 2018, because staying grateful and thinking of everything that makes you happy helps with mental health, too!

Start the day doing something you love instead of reading or listening to the news

While it’s great to stay updated on what’s going on in the world, it can also be extremely stressful. Instead, listen to your favorite music or podcast, read a book for ten minutes, do yoga, meditate, go for a run, or anything else that you enjoy. I look at the news after I’ve done something that makes me happy, and it definitely helps me from feeling immediately down!

Go to sleep early(er)

It’s not always possible to start going to sleep super early, but try and go to sleep a little bit earlier than usual so you can get a full nights rest. I’m sure you’ve heard this tip time and time again, but it’s because it’s the easiest way to feel better. As a college student, I definitely struggle with this, but on the days where I do get seven or eight hours of sleep, I feel so much better and can function throughout the whole day.

Follow Twitter or Instagram accounts that make you happy

This seems so simple, but I can’t stress enough how happy it can make you. I personally follow Thoughts of Dog on Twitter because I love dogs and it never fails to make me laugh. There are countless cute animal accounts, and following them and filling your timeline with cute puppies and kittens can go a long way with helping your mental health.

Talk it out

If you aren’t ready to talk to a counselor, reach out to a friend or family member and talk to them whenever you feel stressed. It’s scary making that first step to talk to a professional, but it’s a lot easier to talk to someone you already know really well. What’s really important is that you’re just getting any feelings of stress or anxiety out, or at least sharing with someone that you’re not feeling you.

Go outside more

If you’re outdoorsy or not, going outside and getting some fresh air to clear your head every once in a while is great for everyone. Going on a walk, or if you like to, going on a hike can help so much and get endorphins running

Don’t be afraid to be selfish

At the end of the day, the person that matters the most to your mental health is you. This is something that should be obvious, but oftentimes we spend our lives trying to please others, but it’s perfectly okay to be selfish and have a day entirely for yourself and doing something that makes you happy. I’m super guilty of this because I like to make sure everyone around me is happy, so a lot of the times I put my own feelings to the side. So many people do this, especially if you have anxiety, but it’s important to take a step back and re-center your focus to how you’re feeling and how to feel better.
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These are all super simple ways to start focussing on your mental health, which is so important. Since it’s still January and the start of a new year, it’s the perfect time to think about caring for your mental health. It’s never too late, though, and these tips can be applied to any time of the year! At the start of college, I was going through a lot with my family, so I started to focus on my mental health like never before and it helped me push through a really tough time. I still have so far to go, but by being mindful of how I’m feeling – physically and mentally – I’ve started to feel better.

Staying on top of your mental health means something different for every single person, and it’s something that’s always a work in progress, so don’t get discouraged if you’re going through a rough patch. It’s just important to do what’s best for you, and there’s absolutely no shame in reaching out if you need help. In fact, it takes a lot of courage to do so.

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Taking a Breath and Reflecting on Autumn Quarter of my Senior Year

posted on : December 14, 2017 posted by : Stnkrbug 0 Comment

When I started this school year, I had high ambitions of surviving my busy schedule. I’ve been working two part time jobs, averaging about 35 hours per week, plus a full class schedule of 15 hours, and have been trying to keep up with all my homework. I thought this schedule would be fine, and I have survived it, but I didn’t thrive as much as I could’ve.

Mad props to all the hustlers out there, because that shit is exhausting.

I haven’t gotten nearly enough sleep this quarter, I haven’t been able to workout everyday like I have for the last two years, and I’m lucky if I remember to eat lunch. Having this crazy busy schedule has taught me a lot of discipline, and although I tried to make time to stay creative and have an outlet, it was hard to justify sitting around reading for pleasure when I had probably one hundred pages of reading due for a class the next day.

That guilt pushed me to try and finish all that I could and sacrifice a lot of sleep to do so. Sure, I left papers to finish right before the deadline, but in total I feel pretty proud that I kept on top of my school work even better than quarters where I had a lot more free time. My bullet journal saved me, as well as leaving sticky notes  e v e r y w h e r e  to make sure I didn’t forget anything.

Along with my busy quarter came more stress than I’ve dealt with probably ever. I had crap with my family, dealt with the craziest situation of someone copying my apartment key, and much, much more. I didn’t give myself a chance to sit down and think through all of that stress and just feel because if I did, I’m afraid I never would’ve gotten up.

I struggled through this quarter, and I’m not ashamed to say it, because I came out in the end. I just turned in my final paper for the quarter, and have finished all my tests, but I still have a couple days of work left. The light at the end of the tunnel is brighter, though.

I don’t want this to sound like I’m complaining about how hard my life is because there are people out there with much, much harder lives. The point of this post is to reflect on this time in my life, and to somehow start to work through the emotion that I’ve put in a neat little box in the back of my head. My mental health has struggled this quarter, and I feel like a slightly faded version of who I was six months ago, but that’s okay.

We all struggle at some point in our lives, and I don’t want to hide from that. I know I should go and talk to someone about my mental health, and I’m hoping that’s something I have the courage to do next quarter.

I’ve retreated into myself to get through autumn quarter, but I’m also grateful for the people in my life who have stuck with me through this time. My boyfriend was my lifeline and the person who talked me through various panic attacks and times of just absolute blinding stress.

I let myself fall behind on my blog and my YouTube channel, something I absolutely hated doing, because it’s such a huge source of creativity and happiness in my life. With that I took more of a break from social media, which in retrospect has probably been good for me.

I’m not sure how exactly I got through this quarter, but the truth is my blood is probably 75% coffee right now, and I think the desire to just cuddle with my dogs over winter break is one of the main things keeping me going at this point.

Next quarter I’m cutting down on my commitments and will hopefully have more time to do the things I love, like post on my blog and make videos.

For now, here’s a photo of my little Christmas tree 🙂

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Dear Junior Year

posted on : June 23, 2017 posted by : Stnkrbug 0 Comment

My junior year of college has come to a close, and it’s been a crazy year. This was definitely the most difficult year so far – my classes were tough, my schedule was busy, and trying to stay afloat was a struggle. I made it out, though, and I’ve learned a lot. Since it’s over, I wanted to do another “Dear __________ year” because I did that for freshman year and sophomore year.

Dear Junior Year,
I was almost crushed by you. Not only was the academic side of you hard, but all of the real-life things were rough, too. My classes had a workload unlike any other year, and I had to start answering some questions about my future, and think seriously about what I want for my life. That’s not an easy thing to do as a 21 year old. Who knows where I’ll end up in life? Have a plan, you told me, and for most of the year I tried to come up with one.
Well, I did and didn’t succeed, but some things I do have now are options and ideas. I have a couple of thoughts about what I want to do after college, and I don’t know which one I’ll end up following, but you taught me that’s okay. See, you pushed me to think about these things so I’d be comforted in the fact that I’ll be able to figure it out, and I understand that now. After many breakdowns and panic attacks, I’ve found (some) comfort in the unknown, and it’s a little bit exciting. Instead of being stressed about the future, you taught me to be excited about it.
While you were stressful, long, hard, and gruesome, Junior Year, you also gave me so much happiness. You brought people – especially one in particular – into my life that have changed it for the better. I made so many memories with new and old friends that I’ll truly cherish forever. I can’t think of better people to have spent the year with, honestly, and you were there to put them in my life. Everyday I’m reminded by how lucky I am to have people in my life whom I love so much, and give my life so much more meaning.
You have made me stronger, and though I doubted myself – a lot – you also taught me that it’s okay to have off days, sometimes off weeks, and that the sunlight always finds its way back in through the cracks. I made it through the challenges you gave me, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. The outcomes from all of these trials are worth way more than the stress they caused, and I’m thankful for all of the mistakes and hardships I went through. My life is better now, because of you, and I have a better idea of who I want to be. I learned that it will most certainly take even more time and even more hard work to get to where I want to be one day, but you taught me that it’ll be worth it, in the end.
Love,
Stnkrbug
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You’re More than a Pre-Existing Condition | “Slam” Poem

posted on : May 9, 2017 posted by : Stnkrbug 0 Comment
It’s probably obvious that I love writing, since I have a blog and everything, but I’ve never really shared any of that writing on my blog, or my channel. I’ve never actually done a slam poem before, but I was inspired by all of the talk about pre-existing conditions, and the possibility that health insurance will be affected by them (in the US). 
As someone with “pre-existing conditions, this news is upsetting. It’s unfair that people should be judged and labeled based on diseases they were born with, or disorders they have no control over. Why should that affect the care that people receive? We don’t have a choice in these matters, it’s all up to our genetics. Yes, sometimes diseases can be caused by our actions, like lung cancer, but many of the “pre-existing conditions” are out of people’s control.
Not only are people of all ages affected, but parents of newborns with these conditions are suddenly forced to face the consequences of paying more for their child’s health insurance, on top of the sheer costs of having a child. All of this talk about “pre-existing conditions” just perpetuates labels, and further makes an “other” category for people in society who are facing hardships and suffering. We should help these people, not force them to deal with their problems in an even more isolated way.
Who are we to judge someone based on something they’re born with and have no choice about? Being able to judge someone because of a condition they are born with make it that much easier to judge them on a more personal level. We’re all different, and instead of letting those differences divide us, we should try and let them connect us and learn from each other.
I obviously have a lot of thoughts about this, so I made a slam poem about it. This is my first one I’ve ever made, and I’m loosely calling it a “slam” poem since I still needed to look off of a paper for a lot of it! I didn’t have time to memorize it before I had a chance to film, but since I really wanted to get the video up, I went ahead and used the paper for reference. If you want to watch the video, you can do so below! I hope you enjoy!
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Cheers to 21

posted on : April 18, 2017 posted by : Stnkrbug 0 Comment

In recent years, it seems like time is going by faster and faster. The last couple of years I’ve been shocked every time my birthday comes around. How has it already passed?! Life is funny that way; when we’re kids we want life to move quickly and it goes slowly, but once we get older it flies by and we struggle to cherish it. The entire day of my 21st birthday I was trying to memorize every single detail of the day, because I want these memories to last and I want to be able to remember them. I spent the day with my favorite humans, and I was so grateful how they went out of their way to make sure I had a wonderful day, which I did.

When I was younger, my parents always threw me huge birthday parties with all of my friends there, and while I’m so grateful for those memories, it’s nice to be able to spend my birthday with my closest friends, and the people who truly care about me. I’m realizing more and more that life truly isn’t about the number of friends you have, but the quality of your friends. I feel extremely lucky to have those people in my life and I couldn’t imagine it without them.
Getting to the more exciting topics, I’ve been looking forward to turning 21 for a couple of years now, mostly so I can finally go to wine painting classes with my mom. Now that I’m of legal age, I feel like I’m just going to complete my transformation into a grandma, and that’s definitely not something I’m mad about. So many doors open to you once you’re 21, namely, better seats at concerts, and movie theaters that don’t allow children. I cannot believe I’m finally 21; it feels like yesterday I was just turning 16.
My birthday was surprisingly sunny, which I was so grateful for. Seattle has been seeing so many cloudy, rainy days, so it was a little blessing to have a clear(er) day. I got to show one of my best friends around the cherry blossoms in the Quad at my university (something it’s known for), and it was really fun to get some cute photos. I recently got a polaroid camera, so I was able to get some instant photos, which was really nice. Photos don’t seem to get printed out nearly as often anymore, so it’s great to have a camera that can do it right away. I’m definitely glad I made the investment!

Here’s some photos from the day:

That night I went out to one of my favorite districts in Seattle, Capitol Hill, and went to some fun bars with my of legal age friends. It was strange being back in bars after spending a lot of time in them last summer while in Europe, but also really fun! The satisfaction of pulling out my driver’s license was pretty great, and I don’t think it’ll get old for a while.

I ended up wearing this really cute romper I got from Pacsun, and I’m so glad it didn’t rain while we were out! The weather wasn’t too cold, it was actually pretty great for an April night, only a light sweater was needed (name that reference). I’m so excited to be able to go to really cute outdoor bars this summer! There’s something so great about being able to just spend time with your friends on a warm summer night, it’s definitely one of my favorite feelings.

Reflecting back on my birthday, it’s still so crazy to me that I’m finally 21. I’m trying to cherish these early-20s memories, because I know one day I’m not going to have the freedom that I do now, despite being busy with college. One day real life will catch up to me and it’ll be hard to spontaneously decide to go out with friends and spend the night out on the town. I’m so grateful I have the opportunity to do so now!

I just wanted to write up a quick post about my birthday, partly so I can look back on it later in life. I hope you enjoyed it, and thank you so much for reading! I hope you are all having a wonderful day 🙂

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How to Succeed in College: Mental Health

posted on : March 10, 2017 posted by : Stnkrbug 0 Comment

Stress, anxiety, and depression affect so many people, and it’s extremely prevalent in college students. I’m sure if you’re a college student, or have been before, you completely understand why. Between classes, homework, studying, and trying to have fun, it’s easy to not make your mental health a priority. Going into college, I definitely underestimated how much stress I would be under and how it would affect me. I’ve always been a pretty anxious person, but college definitely made it a lot harder to deal with.

Through all of this, though, I learned how to become stronger, and how to calm myself down when it all gets to be a little too much. I also learned how important it is to make sure you are not only physically healthy, but mentally healthy. Mental health is something that more and more people are talking about, but there’s still stigma surrounding it, especially when many college students want to appear as if they are just fine at balancing everything in their lives. It’s also really important to talk about right now with the popularity of 13 Reasons Why!

In my new series, How to Succeed in College, I knew I wanted to do a post all about mental health, so here it is! I’ll be giving you my tips on how to make sure your mental health isn’t suffering, and how to not let the stress of college get to you too much.

You can also watch my video about it here!

Preventative Measures
1. Try and organize your schedule as much as possible.
If you read my last post in this series, Balancing Work, Classes, and Fun, you know how organized I like to keep my schedule. I can’t stress how helpful this is; if you’re anxious like I am, it’s nice to know what I have to do, when I have to do it, and where. There’s no worse feeling than thinking you’re forgetting something, because that just makes you worry even more than you probably already are. Getting a planner and writing your schedule down in it is super helpful, as well as keeping track of work, assignments, tests, and due dates. I usually have my planner with me, and I also use Google calendar so I have my schedule on my phone for the times I don’t have my planner.
2. Try and get assignments done early, as well as study early.
This is so much easier said than done while in college. Chances are if you aren’t doing homework or studying, you’re working or in class. When you’re struggling with your mental health, though, it’s nice to get things done early so you have time to focus on relaxing and unwinding from the day. I’ve been trying to do this lately, and it’s really made a difference on the amount of stress I put on myself. When I get my assignments done a couple of days before they’re due, I have ample time to look over them and change things if need be, as well as be at ease that I won’t be missing a deadline.
3. Get enough sleep.
Again, this is a lot easier said than done in college, but trust me it helps a lot. When I’m tired I’m so much more cranky and can’t focus on the tasks at hand, and my mind feels like it’s in 1,000 places at once. I like to try and get at least 8 hours of sleep per night, but that hardly ever happens. When I at least get 7 I can function a lot better, but a lot of times this is difficult to do. If you find that it’s hard to have time to sleep for 8 hours, try and take a short nap during the day, to do a mini reset on your mind. This helps me a lot, because I’m able to focus more on the homework I have to get done, instead of yawning the whole time.
4. Workout as much as possible.
I feel like I mention working out in any of my “wellness” posts, but that’s only because it helps me so much. When I workout everyday, my mind is able to focus so much better, and I’m just a generally happier person. My parents joke that I woke up on the wrong side of the bed if I don’t workout in the mornings when I’m home for breaks, which is probably true. I get so cranky when I don’t workout because I feel so much more anxious during the day; being able to clear my head for an hour in the morning and only focus on my workout and how I’m physically feeling is so wonderful. I’m not worrying about anything else in my life because I’m so focused on the task at hand and my mind is occupied. 
What to do When You Feel Overwhelmed
1. Get your mind off of what you’re stressing about.
When you’re extremely stressed out or are feeling overwhelmed, it’s really important to give your mind a break. This can be hard to do, because you feel like if you stop stressing about something, or stop focussing on it you’ll fall behind in some way. If you give yourself a break, though, and focus on something else, you’ll feel a lot better. Read a good book, take a nap, watch TV, anything that helps you relax. This will give your mind a small reset, and you’ll most likely have a different perspective on the issue you were facing before. I end up doing this all the time – I’ll stress and stress about something, and force myself to get my mind off of it for a while, and when I go back to the thing that was stressing me out, I find that it’s much more manageable because my view on it has changed. It’s no longer as scary or overwhelming, and I feel like I can actually solve the problem, or get it done if it’s a task.
2. Talk it out.
It can be hard to talk about the things that are stressing you out, but it can also be extremely helpful. Whenever I feel like I have about 5,000 things going on at once, I call my parents or talk to my friends about what’s stressing me out. I don’t know if it’s them giving me advice, or just the fact of me talking through my anxiety that is most helpful, but either way it ends up making me feel a lot better. They offer a new perspective, and my parents are especially good at helping me feel less anxious since they have almost 21 years of experience with talking me down from my stress. Try it at least once; talk to your friends when you’re freaked out over tests, or are just generally really stressed out, because chances are they feel the same way, or have in the past, and can probably offer some great advice.
3. Get some fresh air.
Feeling anxious, depressed, or just generally unwell can make you feel like you’re cramped. I know I always feel like this when I’m feeling especially anxious, and I have found that getting outside and getting some fresh air helps leaps and bounds. Being in a large open area helps stop the feeling of being swallowed up by both my stress and whatever room I’m in, and it also helps to clear my air. Even if you aren’t a super outdoorsy person, getting fresh air can be great for helping you feel better. You’ll most likely be able to get your mind off of the stress, even for just a couple of minutes, and it will help change your perspective.


4. Change your scenery.
Similar to the last point, getting out of the space you’re in can also help change your state of mind. If you’ve been studying (and probably stressing) in the library forever, or your own room, try and go somewhere else. This will stimulate your mind in different ways, and sometimes it’s just great to have a different view. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in anxiety, stress, and depression when you’ve been sitting in the same place forever, or if you are always in the same space day in and day out. Switching up the place where you spend most of your time can be really helpful. Your mind has muscle memory, and you’ll start associating a certain place with certain emotions, so if you tend to feel anxiety or especially depressed in one place, try and go somewhere else.
5. Laugh.
This seems obvious, or even a little ridiculous, but I can’t tell you how much it can help. One of my professors who has a doctorate in psychology told my class that even just smiling at yourself in the mirror can help you feel happier, so try this out. You will feel absolutely ridiculous at first, but it truly does help. Trick your brain into thinking you are happy – it actually does work – and you will feel less anxious. Watching a show that you know makes you laugh, or talking to people who always makes you laugh will help you to get out of your head and just have a good laugh.
6. Make some art, or do something else you love.
For me, watercolor is something that immediately sets my mind at ease. It’s relaxing, and makes me focus purely on creating, something that I love to do. Art is extremely relaxing, and it doesn’t matter if you have a lot of experience, or none at all. When you’re stressed or anxious, get some paper, paint (or pens if you don’t have paint) and just create. This puts your mind at ease, and trying to think of something to paint or draw will take your mind off of whatever is causing your uneasy mind. If art really isn’t your thing, then do something else that you love and relaxes you. As long as it makes you happy, it will make you feel even a little bit better.
Mental health can be hard to balance and handle while in college. It’s extremely important to take care of yourself, and treat yourself kindly when you’re feeling stressed, anxious, depressed, or just generally unwell. While all of these tips are great for helping you deal with stress and anxiety, if you ever feel like hurting yourself, or you see someone you care about harming themselves, reach out for help. There is no shame in needing to talk to a professional, or take medication that helps you control any sort of mental health struggle. Resources like Suicide Prevention Lifeline, Crisis Clinic, or The Trevor Project are all great organizations to contact if you feel like it is an emergency.

I hope you are having a wonderful day, and remember that you are worth it ♥
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Why You Should Reflect on the Things That Make You Happy

posted on : March 25, 2016 posted by : Stnkrbug 0 Comment

Happy Friday! I can’t believe it’s already time for the weekend again, this week (and spring break!) has flown by insanely fast. I’m sad that my break is coming to an end, but I’m also really excited for my classes next quarter! I’ve enjoyed my time with my puppies and kitties – I can never get enough – and I will definitely miss them when I go back to school. It’s been nice just being able to relax and not worry about school and work!

Today I wanted to talk about something that’s super important: reflecting back on what makes us happy. I was really inspired to talk about this by Renee from Lose the Road (seriously, go check out her blog – she’s one of my favorite bloggers!), because she posts about what made her happy throughout the week. This is such an awesome way to think back on the things that made you feel joy, rather than focus on all of the negative things that happened throughout the week. Scientifically, it is in our nature to focus on the negatives parts of life since those occurrences pose the most danger, so it’s really important to combat those thoughts with happy memories.
I fall victim to focusing on the negatives very easily since I worry about things so often. It’s extremely difficult for me to turn off my brain sometimes, and I just end up going over bad occurrences over and over and over to try and see if there was anything differently I could’ve done in order to change the outcome. I know so many other people struggle with this as well, and it really can be the worst. It’s hard to stop worrying about something, especially when it affected you in a negative way. This, however, causes so much unneccesary stress, because there is literally nothing you can do to change the past; it is physically impossible (unless, you know, you believe in time travel and wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff).
Even though it’s easy for me to get caught up in the anxiety of negative memories, I try to be an optimist. My brother is very much a pessimist, so when I was younger I tried to be the one who looked at the brighter sides of things. Being an optimist isn’t always easy, or doesn’t always come naturally, so thinking about what made us happy throughout the week is a great way to start seeing things in a different light. When you reflect back on positive memories rather than negative ones, life really does seem more happy, and optimism comes more easily. Thinking about what made us happy also allows us to be more grateful for those things, and not take them for granted. It puts life in perspective, and helps us understand that there will be ups and downs in life that are most often out of our control.
And while it is important to learn from your mistakes and unhappy events, it is unnecessary to focus on them incessantly. Learning from something and not being able to let it go are two different things – I’ve been there before, and let me tell you it is not healthy. Sometimes it’s best to let things go when they are only making you stress out, and aren’t offering you anything but negative side effects. It took me a long to understand this, and I still struggle with it. I still focus on things that didn’t have the best outcome, and go over them again and again in my head, but it’s getting easier to simply let go of the things that I cannot change.
As Renee does in her posts, I wanted to share a couple of things that made me happy this week!
Sleeping in with my dog until 10 a.m.
I don’t sleep in while I’m at school in Seattle, and get up around 8 almost every morning to work out before class. Since I’ve been home and haven’t had anything to get done in a timely manner, I’ve been able to sleep in more, eat breakfast whenever, and go to the gym around midday. While I really enjoy getting up early and starting my day, it’s nice to have a break from the structure! Plus, I don’t get to have my dogs and cats in my bed while I’m at school of course, so it’s been so nice to be able to cuddle with them all.
Spending the day out in the sun with my family.
It’s been pretty rainy and gloomy for most of spring break, but there was a sunny day in the beginning of the week that my family and I spent outside doing some yard work and general straightening up! Days like these used to be tedious to me as a child, since it meant a whole day of chores, but now that I’m older I really enjoy them. It’s so satisfying cleaning things up, and it was nice to spend the day with my parents because I don’t see them as often anymore. Spending the whole day outside also meant I had a whole day to throw Willow’s favorite toy over. And over. And over. Seriously, the dog does not get tired ever!
Hanging out with my family who now lives close to us.
Since my family moved a little while back, we found out we actually live about 15 minutes away from some of our family that I had never actually met! It’s been really fun getting to know them and finding out all of our similarities. I grew up near part of my dad’s side of the family, so it’s nice to meet part of his other side!
Being able to watch as many Harry Potter movies as I want.
Being on spring break has meant that I have a lot of free time on my hand, so I’ve been spending a lot of it watching Harry Potter. I always tend to do this on breaks from school since it’s something that reminds me of home, and because I’m just generally a huge Harry Potter fan. It also gives me that nice warm and fuzzy home feeling. My parents are saints, and tolerate these marathons, which is a plus.
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Those are just a couple of things that made me happy this week, and some things that definitely were the highlight of my week! These things don’t always have to be huge and extravagent; they can be as little as wearing your favorite sweater and receiving a compliment. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter how big or small an event is – if it makes you happy, that is all that matters.
What made you happy this week?

Thank you so much for reading, and have a wonderful day! 🙂
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The Importance of Yoga and De-Stressing | Fit Friday

posted on : January 29, 2016 posted by : Stnkrbug 0 Comment
Ahhh, let us all have a collective sigh of relief that it is finally Friday, and that we all have some much needed R&R time. It seems like the weeks get busier and busier as I get farther into college, so weekends are definitely a small blessing in the endless sea of work, tests, and papers. For today’s post, I thought it would be a great idea to talk about de-stressing, and how I do that through yoga. I have been doing yoga a lot lately, and I always feel so fantastic afterwards!

College can be super stressful, and it’s difficult to find time to actually unwind and relax. Whenever I do find time to do nothing, I always feel guilty and like I could be doing something productive. It is a never-ending vicious cycle, and one that makes de-stressing very hard!

There’s a club at my university that is $5 for the whole quarter of yoga, so it’s basically unlimited yoga classes! It’s pretty amazing, and the classes are great because they have fantastic yoga instructors. I have done yoga here and there in the past, but never consistently, and ohmygosh does it do wonders for your body and mind! During the classes, I can feel myself relax into a place where I don’t think of anything else but what I am doing in the current moment. It’s calming as well, which is fantastic for my anxiety.

It can be really hard to be present in the current situation at hand; we are always so worried about the future, and how we handled the past, that we forget to live in the now. This is so important to do, however, because your whole life will pass you by without you even knowing it. Living in the moment is one of my goals this year, because I want to make sure I am making the most out of everyday. I am so guilty of worrying about the future to the point where I’m not even paying attention to the present. Yoga has really put that into perspective for me, because it makes you focus on the here and now.

Okay, I just had to quickly show you guys my new Nike’s as well! I got them for Christmas, and I have been loving them so much. They are so bright and cheery, but also super comfortable!

Look at those pastels, oh my gosh.

If we are talking about the logistics of yoga, I usually wear short or long yoga pants (okay, duh Kendra), with either a flowy long sleeve shirt, or a tank top of some sort.

Shirt: This was a Christmas present, so I don’t actually know where I got it. I think JCPenny’s!
Pants: Lulu Lemon
Shoes: Nike

I am so in love with these pants! The marble print is so cool, and they are really comfortable for yoga.

I cannot stress enough how important it is to make time to relax, and forget about the stress you are feeling. These last couple of weeks have been so difficult and stressful for me. I have been applying to my major, applying for study abroad programs, and I have had a multitude of tests and papers. Basically, it’s just been what every normal college student goes through by their sophomore year! As you get further into college, the stress gets more and more overwhelming, and I am trying to adjust to that. Going to yoga, though, has helped me have at least an hour a day to find time to relax and forget about all of my worries.

Even if it isn’t yoga, find something that de-stresses you, and allows you to have some relaxation time! It is invaluable to have an activity to alleviate stress, so go out and find one, and feel better. Your mental health will thank you.

How do you manage stress?

Thank you so much for reading, and have a wonderful day! 🙂

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The Year I Learned How to Love Myself

posted on : January 1, 2016 posted by : Stnkrbug 0 Comment
2015 was a very important year for me, and I’ve been working on a special project for a while now. Today, the last day of 2015, is the day I decided to post this video and blog post, and I can’t believe it’s finally here. I have really poured my heart and soul into this project, and I’m so proud of how it came out. I made a video, and wrote a longer explanation post, so check both out, and let me know what you think! I hope you like it!
            Loving yourself does not come easy. It’s something that I’ve always wanted to do, but have never felt like I had the ability to. Because of this, one of my goals for 2015 was to learn how to love myself. I knew it would be hard, but I at least wanted to try.
            I have never felt comfortable in my own skin, and I always compare myself to others about everything: thoughts like “that girl has tanner skin than me”, “look at her tiny waist”, or “my arms will never look like hers,” constantly fill my head. I’ve always been insecure about my body, and myself in general. My body image has also never been good, and I especially struggled with it while growing up.
When I was 12 years old, I was bullied by a boy in my class. He called me fat each and everyday, which was one of my biggest insecurities. I wasn’t fat by any means – I was a dancer who had muscles in order to enable my body to do the sport that I loved. I mean sure, I wasn’t the tallest or thinnest girl in my class, but I come from a short family, so long and model thin legs were never going to be in my future. That was okay, but as a young girl going to school, being told that I was fat by a boy in my class hit home, and I started to truly believe it. He didn’t know that I spent hours each day at my dance studio to improve my dancing, all he saw was that I was different from the other girls. I also read too much according to him, and he thought it was strange that I was so much quieter than everyone else. I was never the loud one in my friend group, and they all had no idea just how much I hated myself and my body.
            I started wearing sweatshirts to school every single day in order to cover up my insecurities. The sweatshirts to me were like a shield against everyone else; they cocooned my body so no one could really see it, and they made it easier for me to not stick out in class. If I could just hide myself from that boy and everyone else, I thought, eventually the voice inside my head constantly putting me down would stop. It didn’t, and if anything it made it worse. With the extra baggage over myself, the boy realized his words had an impact, which to bullies, realizing they are actually hurting someone is like striking gold. His remarks only got meaner, and he put me down every chance he got.
            I never told anyone, even my family who was extremely close and supportive of me, that I was getting bullied, or that I hated myself. I wouldn’t even look in the mirror because I was afraid of what I would see, and I avoided the camera at all costs. My mom and I would pick the cutest outfits out for school, but I would always put a sweatshirt over them and tell her I’d just take it off when the day warmed up. That time never came, of course, and I kept the sweatshirts on the whole day, no matter how warm I was. They were my security blanket, and they hid me from everyone else. I don’t think anyone realized just how insecure I was about my body, or how inadequate I felt. It didn’t help that I had the meanest teacher in our grade, whom was sexist against girls and constantly put us down while praising the boys in the class. This only empowered my bully because he felt so untouchable.
            My struggle with my insecurities continued on for the whole year, but between the summer of sixth and seventh grade, I took off my sweatshirt in front of my friends because it was so warm. They were so shocked at seeing me without my second skin, and it was in that moment that I realized just how crazy it was that I had been wearing them every single day for a year and a half.
I went into middle school and discovered makeup, which I loved to play around with. I probably wore way too much to school, but it was something that I loved and made me feel more confident. I started wearing those cute clothes my mom and I picked out, without covering up with a sweatshirt everyday. I switched from dance to cheer (a decision I now regret), and ended up finding a best friend. I had also met two girls in orchestra, who would later become two of my closest friends in the entire world. My confidence kept getting better and better, and by the time I was a freshman in high school, it had vastly improved from when I was 12.
            Freshman year arrived quickly, and with it came many ups and downs. I quit cheer, a decision I am very happy with, and decided to join the swim team full time (I had swam on and off my whole life). It was something I was good at and something that I absolutely loved. I found wonderful friends who were fun and exactly what I needed at the time. They were accepting and supportive, and I’ll always be grateful to them for letting me into their close-knit group. For the most part, the year was great, and I started liking myself more.
The end of the year was where the down started. My best friend at the time, the girl I met cheerleading, started acting like a completely different person from the one I got so close to. Our friendship ended, not horribly, but not on a good note either, and I spent the summer being pretty lost. I’m grateful to her for being there with me in middle school, and we truly did have great memories from that time. I was able to go through those two years with someone who accepted me, and no matter who the person she is today, the girl I was best friends with was wonderful.
That summer was hard for me because I had just lost my best friend, and I felt so lonely. I started hanging out with two other girls, however, and found the best friendships I’ve ever had. Joycie and Rachel were there for me in a way they probably don’t realize; I could literally be the weirdest person in the world and there was never any hesitation on their part that we were sisters in all but blood. They were my best friends then, now, and will be always, and I can’t thank them enough. Because of their total acceptance of all my weird quirks (trust me, there’s a lot), I was able to start accepting myself as well. I thought if these two girls don’t care about my faults, why should I? With them, my supportive family, my friends from swim, and swim itself, I was in the best place I had ever been.
The rest of high school was both good and bad – as all experiences with high school are – and my confidence varied from time to time. I took hard classes with incredible teachers, and my love for English, Spanish, and learning about different places across the globe solidified. I got my first serious boyfriend at the end of junior year, but it wasn’t the best relationship. He made me feel lesser in every way; less beautiful, less smart, and less of a person in general. I don’t think he called me beautiful once, but I also learned that our relationship was not what healthy ones were like. It was short-lived, luckily, and I actually learned a lot about myself through the mistakes that we both made. Ending the relationship made me stronger and more confident because I learned how to stick up for myself.

The summer before college was spent making memories with my best friends, and we had a blast. I was nervous going into college because I was afraid I would be homesick every day, not be able to do well in my classes, or that I wouldn’t find a solid group of friends. None of these things happened, and though freshman year wasn’t everything that I expected it or wanted it to be, it was everything that I needed, and I wouldn’t change a thing about it. I made awesome friends, and ended up absolutely loving it there (and I still do today!).
 I came out of winter break and into the new year, 2015, worried that I wouldn’t be able to keep up this track of being happy with myself. So, that’s why one of my goals was to learn how to truly love myself. I have always loved the idea of self-love, and thought I would achieve that when I looked or felt a certain way. I thought that when or if I got a gorgeous guy’s attention by looking the way I had always wanted, it would all just click for me, and bam I would love myself. Well, ladies and gents that is not how it works. Like any relationship, loving yourself takes time and effort, and you have to love yourself before you can love others.
You would think it’d be easy to get to know yourself because, hello, it’s not like you haven’t met yourself, but it is hard work. Loving every single part is hard, hard work. You have to love the quirks and “faults” as well as your best qualities. Let me just say, though, your quirks and shortcomings can be some of the most beautiful parts of you. They are what set you apart from everyone, so make sure to give those parts some extra lovin’.
Body image is also a huge part of self-love. I have always had horrible body image; I’ll be the first to admit it. I saw my body as a failure because I wasn’t the tallest and thinnest girl out there. Again, comparison comes into play here big time. I compared my body to probably everyone I met, which was not a healthy thing to do at all. No, I don’t have model long legs, or world-class abs like Olympic stars; however, instead of thinking of these things as failures, I choose to love my body as it is. Sure, I work out everyday to stay in shape, and simply because I enjoy working out, but I no longer think “I’ll love my body when…” because that isn’t how anyone should think. I work out and eat right because I love my body. It does amazing things for me, and allows me to pursue the crazy dreams and goals I have. It lets me see the people I love, and go on adventures with. I can see all of the incredible sights this world has to offer because of my body, whether or not I have the “perfect” one, if there is such a thing. Our bodies do some pretty crazy things, and allow us to live this life we’re given. To not love it is a half-life; doing awesome things, but not appreciating the vessel we can do them in. I know I’m not the prettiest girl in the world, but there’s no one else out there like me, and there’s no one else out there like you. You are the only person who can be you, so never compare yourself to others. They are living out a completely different story to yours, so of course they’re going to be different.
My journey to self-love was a long and hard one, as they so often are. It’s hard to love yourself when there are people telling you that you won’t amount to anything, that you aren’t anything special, or that you’re ugly. We’re all special in our own ways, and you get to decide how far you go in life, not other people. Yes, there are going to be hard things for you to go through, but you react in the way that you want to, ultimately. You can let those people knock you down, or you can try your hardest to prove them wrong. I hope one day I can simply tell that boy from grade school that I made my dreams come true, despite how hard he tried to crush them, and that I love my body now. Please, please, please, don’t ever let anyone stop you from doing what you love. Regardless of whether or not your dreams are the “right” ones, or if they’re “too big” for you to reach, at least try. Honestly, what is the hurt in trying? You will truly never know if you can make it, if you don’t ever try. And don’t just give half the effort – fully and truly go for your dreams with all you’ve got. We get to decide what we do with this life, so you might as well do as much as you can.
So, the reason for this long, long rant is for you to realize that loving yourself is one of the best things that could happen to you. It takes a lot of time and effort, but the best relationships do. Start with small things, and work up to the bigger and harder things. And please also realize your body is beautiful – flaws included. They are what make you unique and interesting, and what set you apart from others. Never compare your body to others, or feel like it isn’t good enough. I mean really, just ask yourself, what is it not good enough for?
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Thank you SO much for reading and watching, and I hope you have a wonderful day!
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How To Get Clear Skin!

posted on : May 26, 2015 posted by : Stnkrbug 0 Comment
Clear skin is something that we all can relate to in our struggles. Especially when you are a young person, it can sometimes feel like you can never catch a break with your skin between hormones, school, stress – the list goes on and on. I have found a skin routine that really works for me, so I thought I would talk about it a little bit since it really makes my skin happy!

I also just want to preface this with the fact that my skin is very dry and sensitive, so I have to use products that are very gentle, and I always try and use more natural products. My skin seems to react a lot better to natural products, so I always stick with that route!
1. Always take off your makeup at night.
It is so important to take off your makeup at night! If you don’t, your pores are just plugged the whole night, which leads to breakouts! So make sure to steer clear of those by taking off your makeup before you sleep.
I use this eye makeup remover from Fresh, and I absolutely love it! It is so gentle on my eyes, and it leaves them feeling really hydrated, which doesn’t always happen with other eye makeup removers I’ve tried. This product also takes off all of my eye makeup, even the most stubborn mascara! I could go on and on about it, and if you have yet to find an eye makeup remover that you like, you should definitely try this one!
After I take off my eye makeup, I use these makeup remover wipes for my whole face. They are made especially for sensitive skin, so they work really well for me! I also really love Burt’s Bees because they’re products are always so gentle on my skin.
2. Wash your face at least once a day.
I know this one is a given, but for me I only wash my face once a day. Anything more than that really irritates my skin since it’s already dry and sensitive. In the mornings I just wake up and put lotion on, and I skip the face wash. If your skin is really dry and unhappy, try doing this! I know it’s necessary for people with oily skin to wash their face twice a day, but dryer skinned people can get away with just once.
3. Exfoliate at least once a week.

 I usually exfoliate on Wednesday’s and Sunday’s, so twice a week, but it’s important to exfoliate at least once a week! It helps to remove the dead skin cells that can clog your pores up, and just keeps your skin happy and healthy!

4. Use a face mask.

 I use the Clear Improvement mask from Origins once a week to clarify my skin, but you can use any type of mask you want! There are some really great moisturizing face masks if your skin is particularly dry (I usually do this in the winter), or masks to help reduce oiliness. I really love this mask, though, and it works really well with my skin! I’ve always had really good experiences with Origins products.

 5. Use a good moisturizer.

 I use the Daily Face Cream from First Aid Beauty in the mornings and night, and I really love it! It’s super important to make sure your face is properly hydrated day and night, so I suggest using lotion at least twice a day. Sometimes I even like to pop on some lotion in the middle of the day when my skin is really dry!

6. Always use sunscreen!
Sunscreen is so important to use even on days that are cloudy! I don’t put sunscreen on all over my body every single day, but I always put sunscreen on my face! It’s in my BB cream, so I’m covered for everyday use, but if I’m going to be in the sun all day (like at the beach or pool) I put on an actual sunscreen for more coverage. Your skin will thank you later in life for consistent sunscreen use!!

I also made a video where I talked a little bit more in depth about all of these points, so you can give it a watch if you want! 🙂

What are your skincare tips?

Thank you so much for reading and have a wonderful day! 🙂